{"id":4368,"date":"2026-09-27T12:18:51","date_gmt":"2026-09-27T12:18:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/uncategorized-en-us\/addiction-2026-09-27\/"},"modified":"2026-11-02T15:52:22","modified_gmt":"2026-11-02T15:52:22","slug":"addiction-2026-09-27","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/portfolio\/addiction-2026-09-27\/","title":{"rendered":"Addiction (2026-09-27)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Addiction (2026-09-27)<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n<div style=\"height:30px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"577\" src=\"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/KakaoTalk_Photo_2026-09-27-20-59-16-1024x577.jpeg\" alt=\"Addiction (2026-09-27)\" class=\"wp-image-4116\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/KakaoTalk_Photo_2026-09-27-20-59-16-1024x577.jpeg 1024w, https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/KakaoTalk_Photo_2026-09-27-20-59-16-300x169.jpeg 300w, https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/KakaoTalk_Photo_2026-09-27-20-59-16-768x432.jpeg 768w, https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/KakaoTalk_Photo_2026-09-27-20-59-16-1536x865.jpeg 1536w, https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/KakaoTalk_Photo_2026-09-27-20-59-16-2048x1153.jpeg 2048w, https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/KakaoTalk_Photo_2026-09-27-20-59-16-600x338.jpeg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\">Addiction (2026-09-27)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n<div style=\"height:30px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>The reason one feels fear is anxiety.<\/strong><br\/>&#8211; If things went well, I was anxious because they went well; if they didn&#8217;t, I was anxious because they didn&#8217;t.<br\/>&#8211; Sometimes, I would even invent worries that didn&#8217;t exist, just to have something to fret over.<br\/>&#8211; And on some days, I would create worries for myself that wouldn&#8217;t have existed if I had just stayed still, only to feel proud after solving them myself.<br\/><br\/>For someone like me, who would unconsciously feel anxious when idle, a good way to overcome this was to<br\/>go beyond <strong><em>immersion<\/em><\/strong> and become <strong><em>addicted<\/em><\/strong>.<br\/><br\/>When you&#8217;re addicted to something, you don&#8217;t feel anxious.<br\/><br\/>The things I became addicted to were:<br\/><br\/><strong>1) Friend Addiction<\/strong><br\/>I would call my favorite friends to a table laden with food and drinks, and only feel satisfied after drinking so much I could barely stand. I wouldn&#8217;t rest until I had kept everyone I liked from going home.<br\/>For a while, I was addicted to alcohol and friends, drinking excessively.<br\/><br\/><strong>2) Achievement Addiction<\/strong><br\/>When I started something, my pace was incredible.<br\/>I would create new plans in a matter of days, and then abandon a business I&#8217;d started just as quickly.<br\/>During the moments I was addicted to something, I felt no anxiety at all. Later, I realized this drive for achievement was a dopamine addiction.<br\/><br\/><strong>3) Sense of Accomplishment Addiction<\/strong><br\/>I pretended to be all sorts of impressive things, but deep down, the traces of vanity were ingrained in my bones.<br\/>Sometimes, I would even try to prove my superiority to the world in a unique way, turning my own shame into a badge of honor.<br\/><br\/>However, after realizing that the presence of people, like friends, was like water in a bowl\u2014something that could leave at any time\u2014I gradually began to distance myself.<br\/><br\/><strong><em>In other words, in the past, I was addicted to uncertain beings who could easily leave me at any moment, and I was like a footprint, following them one step at a time.<\/em><\/strong><br\/><br\/>I also came to accept that achievement is like a wave; there&#8217;s a pattern where good times are followed by bad times.<br\/><em><strong>After that,<\/strong><\/em> I <em><strong>began to seek<\/strong><\/em> a form and flow of waves that would last long and thin rather than being dramatic.<br\/><br\/><strong><em>However, the sense of superiority remained, just in a different form.<\/em><\/strong><br\/><br\/>If I couldn&#8217;t be number one nationwide, I would subtly change the game&#8217;s location and method to be number one even in an alleyway.<br\/>This was my innate desire to be the leader wherever I was.<br\/><br\/><mark style=\"background-color:rgba(0, 0, 0, 0)\" class=\"has-inline-color has-ast-global-color-0-color\">My addiction shifted its focus from others to my inner self,<br\/>and I began to desire a calm, lasting presence rather than a brilliant blaze.<br\/>And I only felt satisfied when I could be the neighborhood boss, no matter where I was.<\/mark><br\/><br\/>All of this was related to addiction.<br\/><\/p>\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Addiction (2026-09-27) The reason one feels fear is anxiety.&#8211; If things went well, I was anxious because they went well; [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":4369,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[62],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4368","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-portfolio"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4368","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4368"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4368\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4370,"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4368\/revisions\/4370"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4369"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4368"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4368"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cimblog.co.kr\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4368"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}